Is Blood thicker than Water?
The ‘incest’ virus seems to be the next dreaded disease after terrorism. What with the hearings of Businessman father raping daughter as per Tantrik’s suggestions for monetary gains. And now the latest story on the Mumbai Mirror edition narrated in first person by a 29 year old lad of being molested by his uncle. It made me wonder where the world was heading to. Or how worse can it get? Life seems to be getting complicated with every passing day and relationships are certainly no exception. True that complexity is what makes it interesting but not to an extent that it elicits disgust, horror and dread. To an extent where it makes one question about the safety factor in one’s own homes and with family? Especially when our country was once known to be the epitome of a happy joint family- one that eats, dines and prays together. Not anymore perhaps.
Coming back to the appalling story of a young man, it made me cringe with nothing but disgust on reading it. From the tender age of 7, he bore the brunt of sexual advances by his uncle. Fear of not being believed forced him to remain silent and suppressed until one day the threshold was reached. Unable to bear it any longer, he kicked his relative and realized that it should have been given much earlier-an act which would have saved much of his psychological scars. His story stated that how there was none he could confide into. He said that disclosing his story to a close friend in college only earned him snide remarks and made him a laughing stock eventually. While he did gather courage to disclose this to his father, the relationship never remained the same as the latter accused him of having enjoyed such advances.
It left him with no choice but to displace his rage in the form of activism. He stood for animal rights and confided more in his dog whom he found solace in and unconditional support. Many a time he had contemplated on suicide. Who could blame him? Especially when he soon found out about his sexual identity of that being a gay. Yet he chose to move on and lead his life in his own terms. He did ensure that his uncle was out-casted from the family and yet couldn’t ignore the fear, the insecurity and the scars that probably wouldn’t heal with time. Being a loner without a choice didn’t help either.
What a shame to hear of such lives being spoilt and scarred forever. I was shocked. What is it that makes family members indulge in such callousness? It would be a daunting task to study the psychological aspects attributed to such behaviour. Earlier it was cases of rape, murder from third parties that brought out the heinous aspects of the world. And now one has to face the same from relatives as well.
Such increasing cases are no doubt leading to young ones posing a lot of questions on hearing about such instances. No amount of filtering can shield them from the hard hitting truth with due respects to the media. Starting from the unsettled Aarushi Talwar case, kids were found asking if their fathers would do the same. The recent occurrence of the businessman makes matters worse. There are clearly two categories which children can fall into. The actual victims and the prospective victims. It made me wonder who to sympathise with more?
While the first set is nursing scars of the wounds inflicted upon them, the latter are nursing fear of having to deal with such scars. While the first set is perennially scarred, the second category of children perennially fall under the insecurity zone.
Another aspect that came to my mind was that of the boy not having gotten support from any source. One hand, we express our sympathies towards such incidents on hearing about it, but when it actually comes to lending it, society chooses to remain aloof. Isn’t it a hypocritical stance? It may not be fair to generalize family factor on a whole based on a few instances. Yet one cannot ignore as to how many incidents like these are happening with a veil from the media. Call it being cynical, pessimism but one cannot deny the strange ways of the world and such occurrences only proves it further. So is blood thicker than water? Or does neither possess the substance of morality anymore?