Saturday, October 04, 2008

The other side of the coin

-By Swetha Amit
The newly wed couple stood on stage lost in their own world of bliss with occasional greetings to the flurry of visitors. She was clad in a beautiful light pink sari which spelt ethnicity all over with its fine mirror and chamki works. The groom stood next to her with his suave gentlemanly attire of a dark suit that complemented the bride’s soft get up. Admiring their ‘happy to be with one another’ stance I stood in the rather long queue eager to offer my heartfelt wishes to the lovely couple.

Standing in line with my husband, we were reminiscing about the similar ‘wedding daze’ we were in, a couple of years ago. Amidst our conversation were the occasional smiles that flew across the room at familiar faces. All the while we couldn’t help but overhear a rather booming voice that was right behind us. The tone spelt ‘critics’ all over as the lady went on chattering away. Little did we realize that the initial impression of that conversation would later make us look at the other side of the coin literally?

“The girl seems rather short in comparison to the guy whom I’ve known since he was a naughty child. I believe that he saw plenty of girls from affluent backgrounds before he finalized on ‘this one’. I wonder what he managed to see in her. He could have just gotten anyone he wanted, being the dashing fellow he is. She is darker in comparison to him, only a graduate while he has acquired two masters’ degrees. She doesn’t seem to be someone who can fit into his social circles. I would never have married my kith and kin to someone like that”. And the ramblings went on like an express train which was yet to arrive at its station to resume a halt.

As I was listening to all this in indignation, I glanced back to see the lady who seemed to be quite poised and educated to look at. And yet such conversation depicted that of an extremely narrow minded person who thought she could assume the right to decide what and who was best for others’.

Such talks were no doubt the favorite among gossip mongers at weddings. It seemed rather inevitable but nevertheless amazed me to the extent of vindictiveness in their talks. The constant comparison is always made between the bride and the groom as to whether they are good for one another. And they fail to realize that the important aspect lies in the fact of the twosome are happy with one another more than anything else. And yet the question always lingers in the mind of third parties as to “who is the better half”? It proves quite impertinent as it doesn’t concern them in any way. Except perhaps provides a ‘brainstorming’ session at least for them.

As I made a gesture to express my disgust, I was stopped hastily by a common friend with an expression which made me decide against it. In hushed tones much to my surprise was pulled aside. The lady seemed oblivious to what was going on and continued her chatter.

What I heard the next few minutes changed my entire perception; as my feelings of annoyance gradually dissolved into a pool of analysis. Her only daughter married a man much against the formers’ will. Rationalizing that as a mature decision of her young one which was reassured of happiness came as a rude shock much later. Her son in law had deserted her daughter for greener pastures which apparently left her scarred perennially. This apparently had prohibited the rather young girl to move on in life which still remained shattered. The mother encountered several thorns in the society which saddled her with bitterness and to forcibly adorn a mask of arrogance.

My head seemed in a whirl as I suddenly sat down on a chair nearby. It must have been a sorrowful plight of any mother to see her daughter in pain. Sour experiences which come as a deal in life’s package can either make one stronger or leave one with a lingering bitter taste on a permanent basis. It is said that time is the best healer; yet it also manages to leave trace of a scar. Call it imprints which are painful reminders as a moral of lessons in life. Others’ behaviour may either please or puzzle us. At times it may not even be justified as the right one which would drive us to the pillar of fury. An analysis of the root cause behind their acts may enable a better understanding of our fellow humans rather than scorn them at least in instances like these.

It kind of gave me answers to the question. "Why do people gossip? Or why are they malicious?

It makes one wonder in this case,” Who or which is the better half?” Can we judge the better half of a coin or the better half of the earth?

As I finally approached the couple, beneath my smile was this concealed of turbulence in search for above question. As I stepped down I couldn’t help but realize that those who appear condescending of others’ are ones who are battling their inner demons of insecurity. This truth of human psychology remains stranger than even a fiction thriller.
Written for

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Blogger Whirlwind said...

Comments on MSN:

sharmishtha - kolkata on 10/4/2008 3:15:30 PM
very correctly said. its only we who can decide what we will make out of a worst situation-the best or the worst.

KP - Chennai on 10/4/2008 8:26:25 PM
Gossip is said to be the opiate of the oppressed or troubled as can be seen from this story.Gossip needn't be false to be evil - there's a lot of truth that shouldn't be passed around.A nice story beautifully narrated.

11:01 PM  
Blogger Whirlwind said...

ayesha parveen - kolkata on 10/4/2008 8:40:24 PM
Very well-written, Swetha. The statement, "those who appear condescending of others are ones who are battling their inner demons of insecurity.", sums up the analysis neatly.

11:02 PM  

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